In May 2010 I wrote a blog post responding to Anita Diamant's query as to "What is on your desktop altar?"
I describe the items on the altar, all of which center around the central piece:
"Clay statuette of Miriam that I made some seven years (now ten) ago on a glorious vacation in the Sinai desert. This statuette, fashioned from simple clay mud found in Sinai, which I sealed with simple glue (now peeling), has chaperoned me through countless ancient healing music tours overseas. It's my number one touchstone."
I describe the items on the altar, all of which center around the central piece:
"Clay statuette of Miriam that I made some seven years (now ten) ago on a glorious vacation in the Sinai desert. This statuette, fashioned from simple clay mud found in Sinai, which I sealed with simple glue (now peeling), has chaperoned me through countless ancient healing music tours overseas. It's my number one touchstone."
I met Ute, a vivacious fifty-something German woman that summer in the Sinai. We shared dinner, snacks and a sun umbrella to shade us from the scorching sun.
Ute dreamed of coming to the Sea of Galilee in Israel. But her mind resisted as did her family and friends. Secret fear and shameful memories of the Holocaust kept her away.
My personal invitation broke through her resistance and got her to come to my Galilee healing music center for ten days. It was a glorious visit. She returned a few years later, and last month, Georg, her husband joined her on a third visit.
The Miriam statue chaperoned both our travels...
Overseas to the US, Europe and even China! It's as if an ancient talisman was guiding from the old into the new.
A few weeks ago, on the last day of Ute and Georg's visit, the cat playing frivolously caused an object fall onto the statue shattering her legs and part of her body to pieces. I was crushed too.
After allowing the strong wave of emotion to release, I chose to be patient and look for the deeper lesson.
Pain always bears gifts if we're open to receive them.
I wondered, when things crash and fall apart, do we need to put our energy into repairing them, or should we release them and start with something new?
Everything happens for good reason.
Closing a circle begun 10 years ago.
The energy embodied in the statue is no longer relevant. It's ready to be released, and soar. I am ready to move on.
This statue has chaperoned me for so long, so it's so painful to let it go. And, I am not an idol worshiper and I don't want to go back into ancient times. I choose to stay in the present, knowing that the ultimate authority is inside, rather than outside of me.
Let the old evolve with the new.
The local shopping center started sponsoring a weekly ceramic workshop. It is a gift for me to return to an old hobby I enjoyed years ago.
Clarity struck like a bolt of lightening...
I'll add new Israeli clay to the old Egyptian clay.
How symbolic! This statue will blend a mixture of ancient and modern, just like the blending of the ancient healing and transformational music modality with it's modern applications.
The mixing and firing of Egyptian and Israeli clay symbolizes:
1) The universal core of both
2) Freedom from bondage to old patterns
3) Respect for heritage
4) Evolvement of old and new
I carefully wrapped the shattered pieces into a plastic bag and waited for Tuesday afternoon's ceramics workshop. To my disappointment, when I arrived, they were already closing up shop. A substitute teacher had arrived earlier that day.
Taking a step, I took out the statuette and asked her how I could blend the old clay with the new?
"It's impossible. It'll blow up in the oven. No use. Give it up... And learn to let go!", she added, perhaps thinking that she would offer me a lesson in spirituality... which she did :-)...
I released my expectation of her providing me an answer and chose to find my own. Molly Gordon, a coach and true artisan wrote a great article about how the hardest trust to earn is your own.
Last week, I brought the statuette back to the workshop, determined to follow my inner voice guiding me to mix the clays together. To my delight, the regular teacher showed me how to do it, though he said there are no guarantees that it will stay intact in the scorching hot heat of the firing ovens.
Life doesn't offer true guarantees.
And guarantees don't offer true life.
If the statuette blows up, so be it. If she survives the heat, she'll be even stronger for it. Either way, the old will evolve something new.
For the time being, I am enjoying the process. What is YOUR experience?
When things have crashed and fallen apart in your life, have you put your energy into repairing or did you release and start with something new?
P.S. Just returned from the pottery workshop where I painted the statuette. Left her with the teacher.who will hopefully bake her in the oven this week. Stay tuned for Part 2!
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